Tag: Litigation

Discovery

Wants Vs Needs - Sticky Notes

{4 minutes to read} I have written before about when is the best time to mediate. No, you don’t have to go back and re-read that blog because the answer is simple: Now. Now is the best time to mediate. 

Does that mean, now, now, or now with some lag time?  Ok, now with a little lag time. A party can’t mediate by itself, so there are by necessity some preliminaries, like getting the other side(s) to participate in the mediation. However, that is becoming easier as more courts increasingly direct the parties to mediation without waiting for an agreement. If you want to see a good example, look at the ADR rules for the Federal District Court for the Western District of New York or the rules for North Carolina State Courts and federal courts: Eastern District of NC, Western District of NC, and Middle District of NC.

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Practice Makes Perfect

Stock Photo Practice Makes Perfect - Image of man practicing saxophone holding music up with his foot.

{3 minutes to read}  There are 24,601 reasons why divorce mediation is preferable to divorce litigation. One of them, however, is that when a couple engages in mediation, they can create the details of their post-divorce life by figuring out together what works. In mediation, they can talk directly to one another about important matters, something divorcing couples often find very difficult to do outside of that setting. Over time, such conversations not only allow the couple to work out the details of the divorce — and creating a new life is no small matter — but help them create a foundation for future conversations. And when a couple has children, the odds are likely they will need to talk to each other for years to come.

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The 11th Commandment

{4 minutes to read} I have written and spoken in the past about automatic court-annexed mediation programs, but maybe you haven’t heard me discuss it or read about it before. So just in case:

The 11th Commandment by Gary Shaffer

Certain courts force parties to go to mediation before they can continue litigating their cases through the “normal” court process. But parties shouldn’t be forced to mediate, should they? Isn’t that a decision the parties should both agree on? Isn’t a basic, guiding principle of mediation self-determination, including the decision whether or not to mediate?

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Anger as a Pathway to Resolution, Part I

Gary Shaffer, https://www.shaffermediation.com, shares his opinion on the emotion of anger.There are very few emotions as destructive as anger. Shootings, murders, rapes, spouse and child abuse, intra-family squabbles (big and small), road rage, divorce, gang violence, are all fueled in part by anger. Anger is usually an aspect of any litigation, although even mediators must acknowledge that litigation as a dispute resolution mechanism is light years ahead of violence.

Anger and violence go back a long way. Whether we take the Bible as historical truth or a fundamental mythos of our collective Western unconscious, the first act of violence is primeval: it occurs between the very first human offspring. Most of us think we know the story, but just in case, the entire events are described in only seven short verses, as follows (Genesis, 4:3-9):

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Is Divorce Mediation Always Successful?

Gary Shaffer, https://www.shaffermediation.com, discusses divorce mediation.

It is fairly well accepted that divorce mediation is a far better way to handle the details of unwinding a marriage than litigation.  If there are any assets and any kids, the parties typically know the details of both, and with proper guidance are capable of figuring out how best to proceed so that the kids and assets are dealt with fairly and everyone can move on to leading happy and productive lives.

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About Us

An honors graduate of Harvard University and the Cardozo Law School of Yeshiva University, where he also served on the Law Review, Gary brings more than 30 years of litigation and negotiation experience to his practice as a mediator. He has successfully negotiated and mediated resolutions in family matters, employment cases, commercial disputes, personal injury cases, and major civil rights matters.

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Phone :- 347.314.2163
Email :- gary@shaffermediation.com

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