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Tag: Family Disputes

Genesis and Dispute Resolution

{4 minutes to read}  Conflicts go back a long way. There’s no shortage of them. Some get resolved and some don’t. And the species has chosen many different ways to resolve disputes. One method with a long history is murder. It’s a quick solution, though not necessarily a long-lasting one.

Cain killing Abel, marble relief on the facade of the Milan Cathedral, Duomo di Santa Maria Nascente, Milan, Lombardy, Italy

According to the Bible, Adam and Eve get off to a rocky start. Even before the trials of raising a family arrive, Adam and Eve have some issues. You may recall the serpent convinces Eve she need not fear eating the fruit from the Tree of Knowledge of Good and Evil. She eats the fruit, gives some to Adam, who also eats it, and things go downhill pretty fast. God notices what happened, asks for an explanation, and the testimony is a model of accepting responsibility and trying to work things out.

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How Much Transparency is Too Much?

Stock Photo of man holding a sheet of clear plastic wrap

{4 minutes to read}  Transparency is one of those “good” words.  People favor transparency and tend to think of it in contrast to secrecy, which is often thought of as a “bad” word.  If you think transparency is preferable to secrecy, raise your hands.  Almost everyone raises their hands, except for those who smell there’s a trick follow-up question coming — which there is.

There used to be a time when large political donors couldn’t hide behind a wall of secrecy.  But really, shouldn’t the well-off be able to purchase the candidates of their choice without everyone having to know?  And wouldn’t limits on contributions be limits on our freedoms? Well, you know the rest of the story….

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Two Game Changers in Mediation

{3 minutes to read} Two enormous “game changer” mediation moments came back-to-back recently. Let’s start first with the local news. On May 14th, New York State’s Chief Judge Janet DiFiore and Chief Administrative Judge Lawrence K. Marks announced a systemwide initiative in which parties in civil cases will be referred to mediation as the first step in the litigation process.

This is a very big deal. While it won’t happen overnight, this will eventually establish New York as the nation’s leader in making mediation an essential component of dispute resolution in the courts. Hundreds of thousands of cases that previously would have cost gobs of money and taken years to resolve — with limited input from the actual parties — will now go to mediation and get resolved with direct input and participation from the parties, with far less financial and emotional cost.

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Mediating Family Business Disputes

{3:42 minutes to read} In my previous blog post on this topic, I described some of the general issues that arise  What Would a Successful Family Mediation Outcome Be? by Gary Shafferduring a mediation involving an intra-family commercial dispute. These included:

  • Resentments built up slowly over time;
  • Allies and enemies;
  • Divergent recollections; and
  • Emerging “alternate truths.”

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Intra-Family Commercial Mediation: Get Back At or Get Back Together?

{2.54 minutes to read} All happy families may be alike, but all families with intra-family disputes involving money Intra-Family Commercial Mediation: Get Back At or Get Back Together? by Gary Shafferare unhappy in their own way. Resentments build up slowly over time, people develop allies and enemies, recollections diverge, and “alternate truths” emerge. Each family has its own unique set of alternate truths that must, at a minimum, be recognized for a mediation to be successful.

The goal of an intra-family mediation is not to get family members to agree on a single truth. This may be emotionally impossible, and recollections can be fuzzy and subject to interpretation. Words can be stated in many different ways and with different intent. What was meant one way may have been taken in another. 5, 10, or 15 years later, the recordings are lost. And to some extent they may be irrelevant.

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About Us

An honors graduate of Harvard University and the Cardozo Law School of Yeshiva University, where he also served on the Law Review, Gary brings more than 30 years of litigation and negotiation experience to his practice as a mediator. He has successfully negotiated and mediated resolutions in family matters, employment cases, commercial disputes, personal injury cases, and major civil rights matters.

Contact Us

Phone :- 347.314.2163
Email :- gary@shaffermediation.com